People always tell say, “he/she’s and ex for a reason,” or “he/she’s in your past for a reason, so just leave them there…” but is that always necessarily true? Do you ever wonder what things may have been like if you had dated some of your exes at the stage you are in your life now; or are you completely sure that they are in your past for a reason? What if you had waited…..
The reason that this topic came about is that recently it seems like various people from my past are popping back up and they are coming at me full force. Meanwhile, I am just sitting here thinking to myself….BRUH!! This can’t be life. I mean just when I had come to terms that maybe being single is what I am meant to be, or I need to continue to work on myself, by myself….they come knocking on the door like, oh hell nah lil baby! We’re about to work on us! All I want to do is be great.
Funny thing is, I’m not the only person that this is happening to right now. Is it a Blast From the Past epidemic right now. But we are all asking ourselves the same questions, is it worth it now since it didn’t work in the past? I’m a firm believer that timing is everything….but to what extent should you reconsider a fling/ex from your past? I honestly believe that people do change over time. I can guarantee that I am not the same Tequila at 32 that I was as 22 or even 26, so I try to consider those things.
But the bigger question at hand for me is, what is your motive? What is your intent for me, you, us at this time? Are you coming back around because you’re bored? Are you back because you think you made a mistake and are ready to admit to the mistakes of the past? Or are you just simply looking for something to do for the time being? Why after 6+ years did you decide to reach out to “make things right” or “try us again”? Blast From the Past….what do you want from me? Why now?
…..is it even worth the effort? This is the only question lingering in my mind at this point. But I’ll allow you to show me who you are today, and show me if my past decisions were the right decision…or if today is another mistake waiting to happen!
Whether we see it or not, our lives are made up of relationships of many faces. We are involved in relationships with our spouses/significant others, friends, co-workers, family members, and even our enemies. But nonetheless, one thing remains consistent they all call for effort, nurturing, and most importantly COMMUNICATION.
Let’s just be honest for a second. How many times have we made a post on social media or sent a text message and the person on the receiving end completely missed the point of what we were intending it to mean or someone created their own assumption which had nothing to do with nothing and it became something much bigger than what we intended? Quite often right? LOL! It’s just proof that communication is key.
Communication comes in many forms. Verbal, written, physical, even unspoken. But equally important is tone. Knowing how to effectively communicate has been something that I have personally have not really struggled with, but have had to learn how to do better. I’ve learned that sometimes people tell you what’s going on with them or how they feel without actually TELLING you directly. But I have also learned that my reaction is also equally as important in the communication process.
I have lost many friendships due to communication problems, but have been able to fix and mend quite a few through the effort of communicating. So much can be lost and equally gained when we learn how to effectively speak to each other.
Promise to do better! Just a random thought for the day.
1: the state or practice of being married to only one person at a time
2: the state or practice of having only one sexual partner during a period of time
It seems these days that most either don’t know what this word means, or just don’t care. It’s like no one values relationships nor marriages anymore in this day and age. What’s even funnier is the amount of people that are actually okay with the idea of being someone’s side piece.
I mean I think we’ve all had our IDGAF moments in life, but at what age do you grow up and gain some type of morals and begin to respect yourself a little more? I know that I personally went through an extended phase in life where I KNEW that relationships weren’t for me, and I made sure that I let every guy know that if he was looking for a commitment, I wasn’t going to be the girl for him. First off, I am a horrible liar, so being committed and cheating just wasn’t going to be the best move for me. Some accepted it, others thought that they could change my mind about wanting to be with them and them only……but let’s move along, LOL. More than anything, it amazes me at the amount of women that are completely okay and actually PREFER to be a man’s side piece and they gloat about that shit too….GIRL WHY?!?
I believe in Karma, and when that bitch finds you, you will reap what you sow. At the mere age of 32, I definitely want to get married sooner that later, and I can only imagine how I would feel if I found out that my man/husband was cheating on me with a woman that KNEW we were together. Chiiiii….want to talk about an episode of Snapped, oh I’d have it for you. You are indirectly ruining somebody’s family. All for what, a quick nut and a couple of dollars? Hell most men can’t rationally afford to have a main household and spend on a second household….so what are you doing it for. Trust and believe, the same way you got him is the same way you’ll lose him. I mean honey, you are busting it open for some bundles and a sew-in! Don’t you think your lady purse is a little more valuable than what you display her to be?
And men, why is it necessary to make your spouse look like a fool in these streets?! Not only does she not know that she is being made a fool of, but you put all your boys in a hard spot when they know you doing F’d up stuff and then they’ve gotta smile in your girl’s face and act like ain’t nothing wrong. One thing I will always live by, if you’re my man and you fix your penis to poke another vagina, you better never bring the broad in my Queendom, and don’t make me look foolish in front of everyone else. If you going to be a hoe, be a respectable hoe!